when daddy deploys...

military families do it every day.

kids endure it.

mom's muddle through it.

families stand tall because of it.

deployment.

ain't always an easy road.

in fact, 

it pretty much stinks in a lot of ways.

but this is no pity party.

in fact,

quite the opposite.

 this is  my way of rooting for the home team

which is why i've compiled a

 humble how-to

on making the 
most of 
military deployments

(according to little ol' me)

1.  know going in,

there are going to be roadblocks.

arm your friends, your family and your handymen.

they will be called upon 

at any ungodly hour 

on any day.  

murphey's law.

as soon as hubs pulls out, 

fridge will break, 

toilet will need repair

and you'll get a flat.

plan on it.

but know who to call.

and you can do this!

2.  busy is good.

stack the calendar.

plan stuff, 

be places,

have things to do.

yes.

you will get tired of running around, 

being here and there

but let's face it.  

busy is good.  

another day down, baby...

3.  say yes to help.

sometimes i forget that i don't wear a cape 

and have super powers to do it all: 

 manage the family, deal with all the emotions that go with 

single-parenthood-by-deployment,

being the mom, dad, counselor, nurse, taxi driver, tutor, cook, do i need to go on?

when friends offer up help...just say yes.  

whatever it is: dinner together, a quick coffee on the run, 

an encouraging phone call.

allow your friends to fill you up.  

you are both better for it.

4.  celebrate the little things.

whether it's weekly, monthly or daily

celebrate how far you've come.

 'kisses from daddy':

stash enough hershey kisses in a jar 

(enough for each family 

member for each day daddy is gone).

eat one kiss a day, every day counting down 

his big return watching the jar get fewer and fewer.

ode to the dadster ala chocolate!

who doesn't love that?

celebrate your anniversary:

 treat the fam (or yourself) to a special 'outing' 

on the once-a-month

anniversary declaring 'another month down'.

starbucks?

mcdonalds?

golden corral?  

your choice...but celebrate.

we once made a paper change marking each day daddy would be gone

(yes, that sucker wrapped around the entire

downstairs twice, i think).

we decorated special rings marking the halfway point 

as well as each month anniversary.

those were the special days, 

making sure we commemorated properly.

regardless of how you do it, celebrate

every calendar milestone you accomplish.

you are his team,

keeping it real back home.

5. surround yourself with good

 good peeps: 

seek out the friend who isn't going 

to let you sit in your own muck too long.

the one who's going to tell you

how strong you are and how you can and will do this,

then pour you a glass of wine and let you vent.

 good habits:

eat well.

we all know the convenience of mickey dee's

but not every day. 

okay?  

promise?

good sleep:
go to bed early.

we need to be on our toes

to handle what comes next.

good habits:
exercise.

find the time.

it will prove you well.

we can do this, peeps.  

this is the stuff our country was founded on.  

and one thing i know for sure. 

we are stronger than we think. 

with God behind us,

we are invinsible.

our guys are counting on us.

now this next part is for all you

non-military out there.

i know you mean well. 

very well.

i'm going to let you in on a wee secret.

here are the things said (however well meaning) that don't
always bode well

while we are in the thick of things.

"deployment?  again?
oh, you must be used to it by now."

nope.

never.

we never get used to it.

much like childbirth.

just because we've experienced it, 

doesn't mean 

we are used to it.

another doozy, 

probably not going to go over well...

" gosh.  4 months already?  

wow.  that's going fast"

not so much.

believe me, 

we are counting down each day,

sometimes each minute.

you get the drill.

just put your sensitive hat on.

we can be very fragile

so go in gentle.

we are strong but not perfect.

best thing about deployment, however,

homecoming.

more on that later.

any thoughts on this subject?
experience?
please share.